I don’t remember what day it was exactly, but a few days into 2020, I woke up and decided to google “1/2 Marathon’s near me”. This was the year I was going to reclaim my health, and push myself far out of my comfort zone. Like most people, the start of the new year brings out a strong need to make a huge change, and the start of a new decade? Even more pivotal. I know we all woke up in 2020 hoping that this was going to be an extraordinary year, but just not as EXTRA as it has turned out to be.
““Ryan, THIS is the year I run a 1/2 marathon!””
Let me give you a little insight into me. I hate running. Like hate HATE. With the burning passion of a thousand suns. So to wake up one morning and tell my husband that I’m going to sign up to run a 1/2 marathon, he was checking my temperature to make sure I wasn’t delirious. We had a good laugh, but then I found the Detroit Race -Women Run the D, and marked my calendar for Sept 13th. I talked about it with a couple people, but for the most part, I tried to keep it under my hat out of fear that I might not actually be able to do it.
MARCH 11, 2020-
I signed up, paid the money, and told myself when it gets warmer I will start running outside to train. Two days later, life as we all knew it had changed. Things we never imagined happening, happened. Panic over having toilet paper. Stress Baking became a thing. We were afraid to be around anyone, but I thought, this will all be back to normal by September! Right? I did a lot of endurance training on my stationary bike, and tried to really like running, but only did a total of 4 runs in June & July, in order to “train”. But I started hearing that other races were being cancelled and I was CONVINCED this race wasn’t going to happen, so I exhaled and figured I dodged a bullet.
AUGUST 16, 2020-
I received an email confirming that I didn’t want to cancel my spot, and that I would complete my 1/2 marathon virtually. Now, if my life was a tv show, I would have been drinking a beverage at the time, and then dramatically spewed that liquid all over my computer. Well shoot. The gauntlet was set. I had less than a month to train. And so in true-Jordanne fashion… I procrastinated & ignored it.
I debated going for a couple runs… “if I wake up early enough, I’ll go for a run before the kids get up.” But that never happened. I’m a pretty active person and I do actually work out every day, lots of cycling classes, weight training, etc… so it wasn’t like I was out of shape, but I knew that if I tried to do a practice run, I would absolutely psych myself out.
In all honesty, I wasn’t exactly sure that I would even attempt it. There was no one to hold me accountable, and if I didn’t do it, I was only out the money I paid to register. I even tried to laugh it off as if it was a joke, on Sunday, September 13th, when I told instagram that I had signed up for it, and had a week to accomplish it.
When I say that I’ve only ever run 2 miles max in my whole life… that is not exaggeration. Two miles. And for some reason I signed up to run 13.1. Skip the 5k, skip the 10k. 1/2 marathon or nothing.
I went for a drive on Sunday afternoon, after I finished a super hard workout. I must have still been coming down off the endorphin rush of completing a 45 Tabata ride, because I listened to “Till I Collapse” by Eminem about 5x, and a few other songs that pump me up. That was it. Enough excuses. Enough Fear. Enough Doubt. January 2020 version of Jordanne wanted to run a 1/2 marathon, so that’s what I’m going to do. It had to be either Monday or Tuesday, so we made the plans, and that was it. I woke up Tuesday morning, brought Jonathan to school. Listened to all the intense pump up music I could find, and I did it.
However you chose to look at this year, there is no judgement, because we all handle stress in different ways. For me, I knew that if I woke up on January 1, 2021 and I didn’t accomplish running a 1/2 marathon, I would be disappointed in myself.
I let fear hold me back for a lot of my life. I’m 33 years old, and have let fear of rejection, fear of the unknown, fear of how people are going to perceive me, fear of failure, I’ve let these dictate too many decisions in my life. One day I woke up and realized I needed to start living and listening to those nudges from God. If I didn’t… this life with these people (Ryan, Jonathan, Verona & Vivi) wouldn’t be. Be brave. Taking those first couple steps outside of your comfort zone are really scary, but gosh darnit, they are worth it.
The first couple miles felt easy, but as it went on, lots of prayer and some intense pump up music had to push me through. I even did a quick facetime with my sister who gave me so much love and encouragement. Sure, I was in a lot of physical pain, had a few call out to Jesus moments & I didn’t set any world record on my time, but I did it. 13.1 miles done… I had only even ran 2 miles in my whole life. I told myself I COULD NEVER run a 1/2 marathon.
What is something that you tell yourself you “COULD NEVER” do?
(Side Note: I’d probably recommend actually training, because my hips and low back were not really prepared for that level of torture…)
I mainly did this as a personal goal for myself, but also being able to show my kids that you can do anything you set your mind to. Circumstances will set you back or stand in your way, but with faith and determination… you can move mountains. This is kinda cheesy, but I have a quote that plays over in my head in times like this.
““Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It’s a very mean and nasty place and I don’t care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain’t about how hard ya hit. It’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That’s how winning is done!””