Ribbons & Bows: Being a Girl-Mom

If you would have told me five years ago that I would suddenly love all things floral, bows & pink, I would have said you were crazy! I enjoy my fair share of "girly" things, but it wasn't until I found out that our newest baby was going to be a girl, did I start to dream about sparkles, unicorns & different shades of pink.

There was this moment a few years ago, God placed it on my heart that I would one day have a little girl. I knew I always wanted a daughter, and was afraid that because I wanted it so badly that, like a lot of things in my life, God would make me wait. I'm on this constant struggle with the Big Guy as He is always working on my patience. I was starting to get scared thinking that this voice that I heard, telling me I would one day have a daughter, was just my own brain trying to convince myself it would happen. 

I kept praying/pleading with God, telling Him, "If you just give me a daughter, I'll stop begging you for more babies." We were so excited when we found out it was a girl, but it never really hit me until it came time to give birth. In my heart, I prayed for a blonde hair, blue-eyed little beauty, just like her brother, I had this vision of what she would look like, what she would act like. It all felt like a dream, and like I was being greedy for making demands.

Then as she was crowning, and the doctor said she had blonde hair, I lost it. No way was this dream becoming a reality. Tears of joy streamed down my cheeks, God is so good for giving me those specific dreams of what my daughter was going to look like. I truly believe those visions were from Him. Late at night, I would plead with him to give us another baby, and he would respond with visions of a little girl, in sun dresses and a sun hat, with long medium blonde hair and tan skin. Visions of her beautiful smile, her big beautiful eyes and I could hear her sweet giggle. God deals in specifics. 

Do you ever wonder, Chicken or the egg? What came first? Did I pray for those specifics because God made me want those? Or did I pray for those specifics and God answered my prayers? I know that He knows us even before He perfectly knits us together in the womb, and these two precious little blessings are more amazing than anything I could have dreamed up! 

I'm the luckiest mama in the whole world! I've been blessed with two beautiful children, and I couldn't love them more! Being a boy mom is AMAZING, and just as equally amazing to be a girl mom! 

My Favorite PENS: Tombow Dual Brush Pens

I remember when I ordered my first Tombow markers, over two years ago now. I was hearing a lot of great things about these dual brush pens, and I just had to get my hands on a few. So I ordered my three favorite colors, (Aqua, Green & Grey) and of course a basic black. When the package arrived, I ripped open the box, grabbed the pen and started writing. Realizing that my handlettering skills were really not that great, I immediately felt intimidated by these wonderful pens! At the time, brush lettering was not my forte and I knew I needed A LOT of practice. So I wrote that I was exhausted, and then promised myself that I would get better at using these beautiful pens. 

I don't claim to be the best at using them, and I feel like I'm learning new things every day, but I sure do love experimenting with them, their blending abilities, and just all around their versatility! 

I really enjoy creating with them and I would encourage everyone who is interested in getting into brush lettering to give them a shot! If you've never used brush pens, they definitely take some getting used to, but I LOVE THEM!  

You can get yours HERE! 

The Classic Black & White: Tombow Mono Drawing Pens

I have spent many years searching for the perfect drawing pen. Back in college, I had an obsession with illustration and would spend countless hours drawing and trying to create perfect images to scan and digitize, but the pens I would use would always bleed, feather & fray. I could never find a tip small enough that I could get the perfect amount of detail. Now, here I am, almost 10 years later, still in love with illustrating and I finally found the perfect set of pens! 

What is it Like to be Normal?

Sometimes I wonder what it is like to be a NORMAL person. By normal, I mean someone who doesn't try to do it all and knows that realistically there are people who specialize in certain fields for a reason and they are more equipped to complete a task better than they are. I know that I'm not educated in the medical field, so I don't try to pretend that I'm a doctor, nurse, dentist, chiropractor, etc, so I will seek the help of medical professionals when it comes to my health & well being. But I do have a Bachelors of Art & Graphic Design, so in terms of all things Artsy & CREATIVE, I say, "Oh I could do that." And then forget or procrastinate when it comes to doing that thing. Are you wondering what I'm talking about? Let me explain. 

I'm a professional photographer & graphic designer, so for example, when I have a baby, I find the need to take my own newborn photos and never edit them, forget to schedule a session for family pictures so I can have photos of us all together, say I will design & order birth announcements but really just take forever, and then kick myself months later for not just hiring or outsourcing someone to do all of this for me. 

I have to still sort through the photos from Verona's birth, Verona's newborn session, her one month & two month sessions, and order & send out birth announcements. In the meantime, I see on social media NORMAL people who have had babies after me have already done all these things. It's hard to have a brain that constantly is telling me that it would be completely normal to add one more thing to my plate. As if Mom, wife, photographer, designer, handletterer, illustrator & now blogger are not enough. 

Being an entrepreneur can be exciting, but some days, the thought of having a normal 9-5 or being a barista at Starbucks sounds like a dream. By no means am I trying to say that those jobs are easy, just probably less tiring than my 24/7 job of being a creative entrepreneur. I promise you, my brain never turns off. Maybe it all stems from my inability to relinquish control over things I know I can do myself. In which case, I don't have enough time to talk about those issues, and they might be best suited for a professional with a comfy couch, rather than me trying to figure out how to cure my control freak mentality. 

Maybe one day I'll order birth announcements, edit my personal photos and possibly design & order albums for myself! But for right now, I'm just going to keep trying to keep my head above water with all this motherhood stuff, and hope I take enough pictures to last me a lifetime!